We know how God speaks to different people in different ways.But mine is special.Through cooking,baking and doing whatever chore.Little revelations and new discoveries are so much more pronounced when i'm getting busy doing things i delight in.Totally unconventional,especially when you tell someone ,'hey,God spoke to me today when i was whisking some eggs'.0_0

See,i was born a skeptic.From the big bang to evolution to santa clause,i'm a satirist.SO,GOd uses great ways to deal with me-Logical Reasoning!sOME peeps are just born to strive,not exactly with any wicked ambition in mind,but just a desire to outperform,outdo almost everybody,almost.Such perfectionism pretty much says a lot-TRouBle.I do have a life apart from studies,just linked more closely than others.

So,my perception of life is either you sink or swim,live or die.Harsh but real.Oddly,baking does not involve sentiments of success or failure.One of the few things that don't matter.Actually, it does but i adore baking goodies so much that aesthetics and taste cease to matter.Ironic.I just like to take my time,laze around and think how great it'll turn out.even if it doesn't,who cares?Now,if only it was this much easier in life.

I sppose this was what Mylene was talking about-contentment.SOme really alien sensation that is barely tangible.And in subconsciousness,i fight for things that i have no use for,battle for temporal things that will sink into oblivion.I grew up with people telling me to follow my heart in all things,but it is always our hearts that condemn us first. Our feelings precede and dominate our lives .My heart tells me i'm never good enough,smart enough,pretty or popular enough or good enough for anyone,even Jesus.Such is the paradoxical heart that i follow and listen to.

It is Jesus who we are first called to follow,not our hearts.He is greater than our hearts because He esteems,never condemns.My feelings were this BIG,but Jesus is BIGGER!I'm not a martyr yet but aren't we called to be imitators of Christ and grow in CHristlikeness?I've found my peace,have you found yours?